Sunday, April 4, 2010

Back in the saddle - I had to add more ie, my madness

I am back to work, full swing, have hit all 3 jobs since returning home on Tuesday.  And yes I am tired, but the money is good.

Right now I am listening to "Kitty Goes to Washington" by Carrie Vaugh of the Kitty Norville series.  Pretty good.   Working on my current cross stitch project.  But time to get the MOJO into overdrive!

I have 3 green skirts and 3 white blouses to finish by April 30th.  I have one Jalisco to finish by April 30th and a slip.  So, Wednesday I will be a sewing fool! 

Pictures to come in the next few days, so "Come on back Y'all!"

Well, I've been sitting here all night wondering why am I sooooo very crazy??  Because I have hypothyroidism.  Now, most people will tell you hypothyroidism does not make you crazy.  I most heartily disagree.  Someday, maybe today I will tell my 12 year journey towards diagnosis.

Okay, so I had this thing for a long time and never knew.  Finally got diagnosised and low and behold my levels were really out of wack.  Enlarge thyroid to boot but no cancer luckily.  It took 2 years of labs and every month a change to my dose and finally I called and pretty much said "enough! leave me on 150mcg.  I will know if it is too much." 

At any rate, things have been going good for the last year.  But if you read my previous post you will know I went to Aurora, CO.  I was gone for about 5 days and got off my meds.  I immediately went back to work and could not stay awake.  Luckily it was a calm night and my co-workers totally supported me and got me through the night - I owe them food!!!  To say the least. 

To make things worse it so happened that this all co-insided with my cycle.  Now, I had the Oblation last summer (love it!) and I usually am not aware of my cycle because I have no flow.  But my hypothyroidism greatly aggravated my PMS to PMDD and I am very crazy.  Of course I was not aware I was crazy because I only inflict on my husband and he rolls with all the waves (gotta love him!).  I was aware that I was tired beyond belief, itched everywhere, skin hurt, swelling, joints ached and for once will you believe my feet don't hurt!  You would think they would because they hurt all the time, maybe because everything else is out of wack I am unaware? 

Okay, so I have been back on my meds for five days and feel I am coming out of the fog.  I took a double dose on Wednesday (so shoot me I needed it!).  Yes, I took 150mcg before going to bed and again as soon as I woke up (day sleeper).  I immediately noticed a difference.  Unfortunately the last thing to improve is always my sanity. 

Anyone that knows me knows I can be very crazy.  I think the older I get the more I don't care.  My daughters bless their hearts are taking notes.  My older daughter dodged the bullet no cramps and moderate flow.  My younger daughter, mommy all over again.  She is only 13 and will lock herself at home because of frequent trips to the bathroom to "change" and has learned to hit the Ibuprofen ASAP.  She also has learned the value of a heating pad and being the most uncuddly of my kids has returned to cuddling up next to me when the pain is the worst.  She is not however crazy or moody.  Thank you God. 

Do you want to hear my diagnosis story??  well it is not long to tell just long in years.  I went the doc and she said "your thyroid is enlarged, I am going to send you to get a sonogram."  Now mind you this is before I became a nurse so I was typical lay person with no knowledge.  So I go off to have the sonogram. 

I am called to the sono room and the tech said "did you drink your water?"
I said "what water?" 
She said "you have to have a full belly so we can see you uterus."  She said this like I was stupid "oh great another one that didn't read her instructions"  I could see the that thought on her face. 
So I responded calmly "I thought you were going to look at my neck?" 
"nooo" she responded putting away her gel and wand then placed her hand on her hip and said "your belly. Now go out and drink xx ounces of water".  She actually pointed towards the door. 

Now, this happened on a PMDD day and I was fighting the despair and anger that always consumes me this long 3 weeks out of the month (it is surprising my husband did not leave me years ago).  And I did not want to kill this gal or break out into tears - I never know what will happen - so I walked out and began to drink the water.  Needless to say I received that day a sonogram on my healthy uterus.

Years, yes years go by.  I see my doc every 2 years because I can not tolerate the "peep show" every year and refuse to go that often.  And off and on over those long 12 years I had been off and on anti depressants to assist with my PMDD. 

So I was again in the doc's office and she was doing a full body examine and she said "your thyroid is really big"  Now, most people do not notice it but merely by chance my mother had said that same week that I had a cyst or something growing on my neck, I blew her off because I did not see anything.

So the doc says, "your thyroid has been getting bigger everytime I see you.  I sent you for a sonogram a few years ago, didn't you go?"  I told her story and she said "what!"   and immediately sent me to get another and ordered labs.  Now my labs have always been "within normal limits" but this time they were badly out of wack and the doc's office called me as soon as the labs came back and I was ordered into the pharm to immediately pick up my meds and get on them.  Later I was told that my hypothyrodism and horrific periods where why I had been anemic since I was 18 years old.  Of course the hypo had caused the horrific periods.  But my doc has since fixed me with the agreement that I don't skip any appointments and take my meds.  So now I have the annual "peep show". 

After a quick round of testing to determine if I had cancer.  No!  Thank you God!  

I am now stable and no longer gravely anemic and much less crazy.  Okay, that said, I have to call and wake my husband and apologize! 

Happy Easter, give praise to the Lord, for he has risen!!!

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