Sunday, September 12, 2010

No, I did not fall of the face of the earth but. . .

Did I ever mention my daughters' nic names?  Jane and Sue.  Aka, Cry Baby Jane and Sing along Sue.  They were attached to me at my hips.  Jane liked a few people and Sue only like her grandma's and me, she didn't even like her dad.  Now that was a sight to watch, my carpenter husband, a real man's man, romance his youngest child.  She really had no use for him.  When I wasn't home she hid behind her sister or her brothers.

By the time Sue was 2 she had grown to like her Dad, her brothers, both grandmas, one grandpa, and her aunts.  She did not like males other than the ones listed.  She didn't speak until she was 3 and then she would only speak to a few people.  She was very petite and would often whisper into my ear "I don't like him". 

Now, my girls are 14 months apart.  And they are very close.  But everything comes easy to Jane the older of the two.  She is very gifted in school, straight A's, and music, she plays multiple instruments and is a wonderful dancer.  Sue, well she is a little more laid back.  She loves to read, will get all A's and one B every report card, also plays multiple instruments but doesn't have the same love for it and she dances as well but again she does not have the same love for it, I believe she is still finding her nitch. 

Sue does love to watch me sew and she has expressed an interest in learning to sew.  She also intends to go into the National Guard like her older brothers and become a physician.  So she does have a master plan.  Where as Jane is still trying things out and enjoying every minute of every new thing she tries. 

I am currently sewing halloween costumes.  I will post pictures later today of Sue's partially finished costume.  It is too cute! 

So I had a come to Jesus meeting with my husband.  Now, I don't like to nag and I really love my husband.  he is hot, sexy, kind, supportive, great dad and funny.  But, he is not a house cleaner, cook or yard guy.  Everyone in my family and most in our neighborhood have these great yards.  Well manicured and landscaped.  We use to when I only worked part time.  But over the last six years I have had to work more and more. 

Now add the following: 2 very large digging dogs, an older home that needs some outside attention - (did I mention he was a carpenter?)  and a tired night nurse who works 135 hours every two weeks (62 one week and 73 the next then start over) and you have a lady who has no engery to do house work let alone yard work.  I get so embarrased when I pull up to my house.  I am really ashamed of the way it looks. 

So I did it.  I let him know I was past the fork test, I was past done.  I needed him to fully partner up or it was going to get ugly.  I don't know about where you live but here in Kansas the union carpenters are not working.  We know guys who have been off for a year, the lucky ones only 3-6 months.  But the way it is running most will work a few weeks then be off a couple of months and so on. 

On August 31st we received a letter from the carpenters union dated 8/31/2010 that informed us that my husband had not worked the required 700 hours in  6 month period and as of 9/1/2010 we have no health care insurance.  WOW.  Way to let us know in advance.  I really think the union has begun to suck big time.  Our union has just merged, been taken over, what ever you want to call it by St Louis carpenters union and they are suppose to be a really strong union - we shall see, right now "not impressing me much". 

Luckily for us, we sent yours truely back to school a few years ago and I am a registered nurse with a BSN (yes I have a college education - thanks honey).  So this momma floats the boat.  I called up my wonderful full time employer whom I love (thanks uncle Sam) and picked up health care benefits for the family. 

So, I have given my husband very clear instructions, we will not have this conversation again in six weeks (yes that is how it has been for the last 2 years).   My yard will look like the neighbors and my house will be as clean as my mothers.  He will partner up NOW or we shall see how bad I can rock this boat because while I love him, I am starting to feel resentful.  Why should I work and come home to a hot mess??  Yes my kids and him do alot to help but they slip and slide.  They will do good for a while and then back slide.  When I worked only 40 hours /week I did it all well, now I can't and I refuse.  He is not working therefore I feel my expectation of him doing it all is not unreasonable.  And actually if he would just tend to the outside of the house I would be very happy.  My girls are good about helping me clean house & in an hour we can have the whole house clean. 

Please pray for calm waters, I hate a rocking boat. 

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