Monday, March 15, 2010

Time to get Serious

I hope really hope - no I am going to do this.

Let's face it the odds are against me but in order to feel better I really have to do this. I am going to be 45 in July. I wear a size 12 to 14 (more on the size 14 side) and am 5"6 1/2". I have given birth 4 times and work 60 to 70 hours per week. I am usually tired and a bit confused, except when working then just tired but focused.

Yes, those are all my excuses. In a nice little paragraph, take your pick any one will do.

So what is it I am want to get serious about?? My body. I really hate it. I hate the 30+ pounds I have gained over the last 5 years. I hate the way it has changed my body and how my once fairly firm body has gone soft. I hate seeling the cheese on my thighs and mid section and my droopy bottom. Oh, what a mental image.

My husband, bless his heart does not complain but I really hate looking at myself. I really need to get serious with the exercise. Nothing too major. Jazzercise 2-3x / week, walking 2-4 x / week and easy free weights only a 15 minute session.

If I want to get really crazy, my daughter wants to start running with me. Yes, I use to run and look damn good too. But alas, life has spiraled out of control. I use to meditate & pray daily.

But looking back there is a common thread in my life that I see, I have never been content. Content to just be in the moment. I have always longed for what was, what could have been or what I want to be. So, I am going to take out my 12 weeks back to me plan and live by it for the next 12 weeks. No matter what the excuse, it is time.

When I turn 45 I want to be happy with where I am at that moment. Yes, there will always be hopes and plans for the future, but I really want to once and for all be focused on the moment. To live in the here and now.

Sewing - well I have cut out the Cinco de Mayo skirts. I plan to sew for at least one hour today when I get home. That should at least get the bottom ruffles put together and maybe all the panels.

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